In theory, your life is in your hands to do with as you please. I read a book recently where the author is talked about making the choice to step away from the life she had been living and seek peace. What do I want to change in my life?
The biggest negative in my life right now is the stress that I feel like I’m living with and under. I don’t know how to let go. I am tense, I have frequent headaches, and I’m not sleeping as well as usual. It is so difficult to get to a place of surrender. I need to see and believe that I do not have to be perfect, I do not have to be everything to everyone around me.
One of the pitfalls of being a single mom is attempting to do everything on your own. I don’t like to ask for help, but I am finding that when I reach out to others, they have so much to give. It’s not just about having people do things for me, which has been necessary at times, but about living life with a community. When I tell my friends the difficulties I’m having right now, I am not just asking for help, I’m sharing my life with them.
After going through a divorce, my world was ripped apart. My husband had been my best friend, and the other people in my life were mostly shared friends and family. After the divorce I lost about 75% of my support system. My mother and brothers stuck with me, but because of the pain and betrayal, I wasn’t very open to relationships with anyone.
What I have learned and am still learning is that having friends is necessary to leading a satisfying and productive life. When we sit down and talk, when I have the chance to bounce my feelings and ideas off of my friends, I not only hear myself more clearly, but get constructive feed back from them. Without them, I would not be where I am now.